The Importance of Self Trust

It's Friday night. You head downtown with yourinside your head and question all the potential
friends into one of your favorite bars.situations that could occur like where the ball
As you walk into the venue, you notice anmight land and how you should hit it?
extremely cute girl glance in your direction.Of course not. By the time you considered one or
What do you do?two of those thoughts, the ball would have hit
It is at this specific instant that most guysyour side of the court and probably bounced
destroy any potential that could've been had.behind you.
If they even acknowledge the possibility ofIn other words, you have to have your head in
meeting the girl, which is quite uncommon, theythe game.
will typically trip over their own thoughts as theyWell, the exact same is true of social interactions.
try and "plan out" what to do. Their mindThere are many subtle details, such as the
becomes a flurry of questions, "What should Iemotional vibe of the interaction, certain types of
say? What if she does this? Does she have ahumor, implied understandings etc. that all require
boyfriend? When would be the best time?" etc.you to focus on what's actually happening.
The reality of the matter is that all of thisGuys worry about whether they'll say the right
incessant questioning is a sign of self-doubt.thing, or whether they'll be able to say anything at
I want you to imagine for a moment that youall. I'll save you the effort of figuring it out...if
are the coolest guy on the planet. Would youyou're inside your head, trying to micromanage
ever "hesitate" to meet a cute girl? Would youthe girl's perception of you, then no, you won't be
question yourself, as to how you should act?able to say the right things and it is quite possible
Of course not.that you will "blank out" and not know what to
The instant you saw the girl, you would havesay, resulting in you having to excuse yourself
immediately gone in and said the first thing thatfrom the conversation like some kind of social
popped into your head.outcast;P.
This type of behavior is quite scary to a lot ofWith any kind of automatized skill, whether it is
men. It forces them to go in "unprepared" andtennis, socializing or playing a musical instrument, it
rely on their natural personality. For guys that areis absolutely essential that you bring that level of
used to assessing situations ahead of time forself-trust to the activity. This enables you to draw
potential problems that might arise, going inupon the developed abilities that you already have.
"unprepared" is very uncomfortable.Don't question what to say, or who the girl's with
But I want you to consider this analogy for aor what might happen. Next time you see a girl
moment...that you want to meet, just go up and make it
Imagine that you are playing tennis.happen.
When your opponent serves the ball, do you go