Real Healing - Practicing "Unconditional Presence"

Do you sometimes sit at home on gloomy,patterned 'contracted' thinking. When we're asked
overcast days and ponder vacantly the securitywhat we think of this or that, we'll often answer
of being in a warm, cosy, sheltered home,according to the 'island' of thought we're presently
protected by walls and a roof from theon. No wonder we are often confused afterwards
elements? There's some feeling of indwellingas to what we really think. We attribute this to
sanctuary our inner child experiences as wemood, and partially, this is correct. If we were
watch the effects of the wind blowing and theasked our view and instead reserved our thinking,
rain falling. We're caught up in it; it's mesmerisingand pondered more deeply about it, we'd come
and rather cool. Then there are songs that takeup with different thoughts and responses--the
us right there...groove of thought might consider a broader
The Seekers' Malvina Reynolds tells of her songperspective. We might even venture into our
'Morningtown Ride,' and the fact that it's a song offearful, emotional responses and question why.
safety for children:Welwood continues, "The full presence of our
"Once in a while I have something in particular tobeing is healing in and of itself."[4] And he
say [to children]--well, let's take a song likecontinues, "We all need to heal our separation
'Morningtown Ride.' I remember how it was whenfrom reality and our struggle with it. The whole
I was little. I know youngsters hate to go to bedworld is in need of that."[5] Genuine compassion
at night because it seems like, as far as they'reon ourselves comes as an indirect result of
concerned, it is the end of the world. Going toknowing and tackling the truth. The truth can set
sleep means you are going to be cut off fromus free.[6] This is summarised as the 'beginner's
everything, and I wanted to help them understandmind,' a willingness to meet things freshly. We
that they were heading somewhere, when theymust resist being experts in the experience of life.
got into bed, that they were heading for morning.We're experts of nothing but our own flawed
And strangely enough, this song became aperceptions, half the time, and that's okay.
grown-up hit all over the world. It really amazedWhen we approach unconditional presence and
me..."[1]"fully acknowledge, allow, and open to our
"Morningtown Ride" worked out to be a lullaby forimmediate experience just as it is, without
all ages. When you listen to it you get that cosyagenda, judgment, or manipulation of any kind...
sense deep within you; it's deep, rich in fantasy,we are at one with our experience, without the
even inspirational. It takes us on the journey tosubject/object barrier... this is an innate capacity
ourselves. It ameliorates all our fears. It connectsof our being, yet we usually have to learn to
us and it involves us, intimately, with the workingscultivate it at first, because the habitual tendency
of our soul, and with those things we don't likeof EGO always involves grasping and rejecting,
(like going to bed all night, for a child), makingwhich reinforce separation and counteract
them somehow okay.authentic presence."[7]
And this brings us to the wonderful safety ofBalthasar Gracian said, "To be master of oneself
unconditional presence. This concept is "theone should know oneself." Being unconditionally
capacity to meet experience fully and directly,present is seeing as we're designed to see; no
without filtering it through any conceptual orfiltering just pure truth.
strategic agenda."[2] It's meeting life head on--onCopyright © 2008, S. J. Wickham. All Rights
reality's terms. Though it's not that simple is it?Reserved Worldwide.
Our lives, if we're normal, are based upon someENDNOTES:
level of 'contraction.' We've learned since childhood,[1] A quote from Malvina taken from a radio
says Dr. John Welwood, how to deny or avoidinterview given at the 1977 Pied Piper Music
certain things in life as a form of self-protection.Festival. The entire interview and workshop notes
We've developed stories that reinforce ourappear in Patty Zeitlin's book A Song Is a
realities providing us comfort and security; storiesRainbow: Music, Movement and Rhythm
that 'contract' our thinking and perception. TheInstruments in the Nursery School and
stories compound a false perception and we'reKindergarten: Scott, Foresman, 1982. Source:
sort of closed minded toward ourselves and our[2] John Welwood, Toward a Psychology of
view of things. "Although we swim in this sea ofAwakening: Buddhism, Psychotherapy, and the
pure awareness [which is how things actually are,Path of Personal and Spiritual Transformation
a.k.a. unconditional presence], our busy mind is(Boston, Massachusetts: Shamhala, 2000), p. 116.
constantly hopping from island to island, from[3] John Welwood, Ibid., p. 143.
thought to thought, jumping over and through[4] John Welwood, Ibid., p. 145.
awareness, which is its ground, without ever[5] John Welwood, Ibid., p. 146.
coming to rest there."[3][6] The Gospel according to John 8:32.
We essentially need to unlearn our default[7] John Welwood, Ibid., p. 307.